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Most Embarrassing Moments
A radio station in Australia ran a phone-in competition to find the most
embarrassing moment in listener's lives.
The top four
were:
4th PLACE:
"While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release some
pent-up energy and run amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her after
receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other customers. I told her
angrily to start behaving and she looked me in the eye and told me in a voice
just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that
I saw you kissing Daddy's Willie last night." After this enlightening exchange,
the silence was deafening. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I
mustered the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank, with my daughter in
tow. The last thing I heard as the doors closed behind me were screams of
laughter."
3rd PLACE:
"It was the
day before my 18th birthday. I was living at home, but my parents had gone out
for the evening, so I invited my girlfriend over for a romantic night alone. As
we lay in bed after making love, we heard the
telephone ringing down stairs. I suggested to my girlfriend that I give her a
piggy-back ride down to the phone. Since we didn't want to miss the call, we
didn't have time to get dressed. When we got to the bottom of the stairs, the
lights suddenly came on and a whole crowd of people yelled 'SURPRISE'.
My entire family - parents, and all, as well as my friends, were standing there.
My girlfriend and I were frozen there on the spot in a state of shock and
embarrassment for what seemed like an eternity. Since then, no one in my family
has planned any surprise parties."
2nd PLACE:
A lady picked
several items at a discount store. When she finally got up to the checkout, she
learned that one of the items had no price . The checkout girl got on the public
address system, which boomed out across everyone to hear, "Price check for
Tampax super-size."
Then it got worse. Someone at the rear of the store apparently misunderstood the
word 'Tampax' for 'Thumbtacks', a guy, his voice booming over the same public
address system said, "Do you want the kind that you push in
1st PLACE: AND THE WINNER IS.....
This happened
at a major Australian
University. During a biology lecture a professor was discussing the high glucose
levels found in semen. A young woman raised her hand and asked, "If I understand
you correctly, you are saying there is as much glucose in male semen as in
sugar?"
The professor responded, "Yes, that's correct", adding some statistical data to
his lecture. The girl asked, "Then why doesn't it taste sweet?"
After a stunned silence, the whole class burst out laughing. The poor girl
turned bright red and, as she realised exactly what she had inadvertently said,
she picked up her books and, without another word, walked out of the class. As
she was heading for the door, the professor's reply was classic.
Totally straight faced, he answered her question."It doesn't taste sweet because the taste-buds for sweetness are on the tip of
your tongue and not at the back of your throat."